Speaking to the Trees

I have been having the most fun of my life. I am so in love with every moment, every person, every breath. I continue to receive fathomless amounts of love from the universe. I have made some new friends, let chapters end, and new doors open. I am following my bliss,and taking every opportunity to create and use my creative energy to fulfill/live my dream. The other day I went on a lazy, hazy Sunday picnic with my good friend Molly. We packed up Lucy (my '77 VW Bus) and set out on another adventure.

~ Side note: I have (for the past year) been clinging on to an idea of how I thought my life was supposed to be. I always told myself I wouldn't close any doors, but since I was holding on to a desire so tightly, even though I didn't want to close off any opportunities, I still was. As soon as I stopped clinging onto and trying to force a desire and let go, the flood gates of all things good and fun came into my life. I had this plan for my life and I was hell bent on manifesting it, and was successful. But in the process of manifesting this one dream, I was shutting out so many other amazing things that the universe had planned for me. Talking about adventures is what made me feel the need to express this, because one of the ideas I was holding on to was that I wasn't going to find any adventure in my home town but that my adventures would start only when I was traveling. As I let go of this belief I starting discovering new people, places and passions where I would have never thought to look. I learned to let go and just follow my bliss moment to moment instead of planning and clinging onto the future. You know what they say . . . . . "With one foot in the future and one foot in the past all you are doing is pissing on the present." - Each moment is a gift that's why they call is the "present"- ;)

Anyways, we went to this huge park about 20 min away. There are open fields, a dry river bed and small hiking paths in the forest. We found a shady spot for a picnic under a tree where we shared pink juicy grapefruit, ruby red pomegranate, and fresh broccoli with wine. After getting a little buzzed....from all the beautiful sunshine.....we set out to find peacock feathers, and frolic through the lush forest. Around 4:00 the sun was casting a golden orange light through the trees which bounced off the surrounding bushes and foliage creating a beautiful wonderland of color and vibrancy. I pulled out my camera and let the magic of the moment unfold with every click of the shutter. Molly and I played, spun and laughed like little girls for what seemed like forever. After we had exhausted our ability to spin we set off further onto the trail and eventually back to the car (after stopping for a few pictures of course).I love the photos from that day, and if anything I hope they remind you of your own playful childish innocence, the sun on your face and the smile in your heart.

Light and Love,

C

One Wild Child

Divine Huntress Strong Warrior

Happy New Year! Almost. This year has
been such an amazing year, and I cant believe it is over! Although I
am sad to see 2011 go, I am more than stoked about 2012. I have many
adventures to embark on and new experiences to experience! 2011 has
probably been one of the best years of my life and I know it will
just keep getting better from here. I wish all of you a safe and
happy New Year!
Anyways, I got my second tattoo this
week! I am in LOVE with it! I am grateful that I found the perfect
woman to work on my tattoo with me. I met Derynne during my yoga
teacher training and though it would be awesome for her to tattoo me,
because she always represented and inspired me to be the strong woman
I talk about in the story of my tattoo. The whole tattooing process and talking

with Derynne and her son made the experience so awesome, the whole process

gave my tattoo that much more meaning. With my story, some ideas and
her intuition Derynne has created the most beautiful, perfect piece of
artwork that represents so much to me.

I would like to share the meaning of this piece with everyone, hope
you enjoy
My tattoo was more of a feeling than an idea and it took
off from there! I could feel where the tattoo was going to
go before it revealed itself to me. So here is the story of
how a feeling turned into an idea, a visualization, and a
symbol of safety, strength and peace.

On a particularly rough day I decided to take a moment to sit
with myself in a meditation/visualization. I put on my
favorite Native American flute music and attempted to let
go of my thoughts. Since I was feeling particularly weak I
started to see myself as a strong resilient, loving woman,
and tried to remember times I practiced strength and
humility. I thought about the strength it had taken me to
love and accept myself, even the strength to fully express
myself with no apologies. I remembered the strength
exhibited to flow through hard times and stay positive
through them all. I thought about my power, and every human
being's power to change and manifest their own lives and
how I have demonstrated this time and time again. While
remembering all of this I saw myself standing on top of a
mountain standing in Warrior Two ( a very beautiful,
majestic, powerful pose to me) and felt the solitude of my
being. It occurred to me, while standing in Warrior II (in
my imagination) that I was my own warrior. Just like one of
my favorite Goddesses, Artemis, was the divine huntress and
warrior of her own life, so too was I. I realized I wasn't
hunting in the traditional sense, but I was hunting, or
bringing to fruition my own manifestations. Artemis was
independent strong and fully believed in herself. She knew
that when she set out to hunt she would be successful. She
lived in faith. Everything came easy and flowed to Artemis,
except when she lost focus and lost faith in herself. When
she was aligned with her true being and purpose she was
connected to all of life and all the universal energies. I
feel that it works the same way for everyone in life. When
we are in a state of allowing, have faith in our ability to
create our future and believe in our dreams and ourselves
everything flows and come to us with ease. Thinking about
Artemis brought me back to how important is is to believe
in myself, and stand strong in my dreams, beliefs, and
love.





After my meditation I felt renewed and strong. Every
time I start to feel down or notice I am not believing in
myself, my dreams and my ability to create I remember
Artemis. I remember that I am the Divine warrior and
huntress of my own life!
A week or two later I was in a yoga class and
as we set up for Warrior II. I closed my eyes and pictured
myself in the forest, bow and arrow in my hands, feeling
strong, ready for the (imaginary) hunt! When I opened my
eyes once again I saw, in my mind's eye, a double arrow on
my upper arm pointing the same direction my arm was and to
the sides. At this moment I felt a deep resonance with this
symbol and what it resembled for me. When I got home I
googled what arrows resembled in different traditions. I
found that a crossed arrow represents friendship,
protection, warding off evil and even peace. A crossed
arrow also has four sides pointing north, south, east and
west. The four points also represents earth, air, water,
and fire with the center point representing spirit. I love
everything it represents and how all of the meanings tie
into what the arrow means to me. The arrow represents
strength, love, protection and union with all of life. It
reminds me of my own ability to manifest my dreams. When we
are grounded in love, faith and belief in ourselves we hit
the bulls-eye every time.




I just need to say something to
everyone who doesnt not agree with my decisions, or does not
understand. I'm am following my heart and doing what I love. My soul
is the same soul in this bodily form as it was with or without
tattoos. That's what I am a soul not this body. What you love is my
soul not this body. Sometimes things aren't meant to be understood,
and that's beautiful. I respect myself and my feelings enough to
realize that my actions have a consequence and I know I will deal
with them whenever they come up. I feel passionately about my tattoos
and EVERYTHING I do in my life (weather it seems rational or crazy or
smart to others) because they all make me who I am. I know myself
enough now to know that I will look at the tattoos and smile because
they are a part of who I am and who I am is a beautiful soul with an
amazing life that I love.

Thank you Derynne for creating with me. You are one of the most beautiful, inspiring woman I have ever met.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/DERYNNE/224213065289

http://www.facebook.com/AnarchyTattoo?sk=wall#!/AnarchyTattoo

Its been a while

I havent written in over a year! This blog was originally supposed to be about my adventures, with the intention that those would be away from home (travel). What I have come to realize is that the best adventures are the ones happening moment to moment, day by day, wherever that may be. So now I am going to switch this blog to an "anything goes" blog. The new year is upon us once again, and I have a feeling it is going to be an amazing one, just as 2011 was. Christmas has come and gone once again and now I am looking forward to summer and moving to Oahu! Thats all I really have to say right now, I have pictures from the beach to post later but for now I hope everyone has a wonderful Thursday!

Dirt

Good morning! It has been too long since I have posted anything, I apologies for my neglect of this blog! I am almost done with my stay here at Hale Akua Garden farm, and it has been an amazing, life changing experience; I’m not leaving yet though so I won’t get into all that now. Right now I am sitting in my room listening to Christmas music…….and I have been since November 1^st. The other wwoofrs say I’m worse than the department stores, I just can’t resist the lights, music, and cheer (wow that sounds lame :p). Im going to be honest here, all this Christmas music makes me SUPER excited to come home!!! Plus I just really miss my dog! So I am looking forward to home, and I am also looking forward to returning to Maui in March!

I will really miss working on the farm. At first I didn’t really connect to what I was doing, and I didn’t have enough appreciation for the work and connecting to the land as I do know. So much energy has shifted in and through me, and it happens when I am connecting to mother earth. I have really embraced the work we are doing, taking care of the land (the land doesn’t need us to take care of her, she really takes care of us), and creating an ideal environment for the food that is growing. From the outside it looks like I am a farmer working on the land, growing food. In reality, I am a farmer working on the land, and she is growing me, creating an ideal environment for me to grow! The trickiness of the Universe is amazing. Yesterday I was in Mana (the grocery store we shop at, and sell to) and I was in the veggie section. I was near the eggplant and noticed that the sign in front of it said “Lady Finger Eggplant Hale Akua”, I got seriously excited about this eggplant. Every day a 2:00 I go into my garden and harvest eggplant that I have watched grow from seedling. I even spent a day sawing bamboo shafts hammering them in the ground with a rock (cave man style) and then wired the plants so they stand up right so they are happier. I spend every day with them, harvesting, maintaining, weeding, and singing to this plant that grows a beautiful food that I harvest package and send off the a store where someone will buy it prepare it and ingest it! It was so amazing to me to see this little veggie that I have developed a relationship with, and put my energy into sitting in the store waiting for someone to buy it. It feels so good to share something you have spent time and energy on, energy I am proud to share with others.

Seeing the eggplant on the shelf made me really think about all the food I buy, and what energy went into it. Was it planted with love, was it sung to, or was it just a product of mass consumption with little energy put into the plant at all. And if I buy a certain product would it be a statement of support for the demise of our world, or be a sustainable choice? This is just something to think about, because this might not even occur to anyone. A lot of time it is hard to get people to care about the nutritional content of the food they are consuming let alone the energy put into it! This is one of the many reasons to grow your own food; you know where it is from, what energy went into it and the degree to how organic it is, which in the end leads to a more sustainable lifestyle which benefits the earth and all her beings. I am extremely fortunate to live on an organic farm. We are able to eat the food we grow; it is really beautiful to eat food you have spent so much time with. During the day I have a variety of the food on the farm. I have the luxury of walking over to the tomato bush and eat fresh cherry tomatoes, pick a piece of kale and enjoy, meander under the mulberry tree looking for the most ripe berries, getting my fill on the most delicious celery. Arugula grows wild, and there are fruit trees all over the property. One of my favorite things is the edible flowers and huge amounts of herbs that are available to us. The other day Bettina and I were even eating the grass (it’s good; don’t knock it till you try it). I have also eaten dirt, which is actually a way to see what deficiencies the soil has. For example if your soil is more acidic, you need more calcium and magnesium. But honestly our soil tastes great! Well anyways connecting to the earth and getting in touch with her energies has really opened me up so I can access places of new growth. Well its Thanksgiving week and I am swimming in things to be grateful for. I hope everyone has a beautiful week and a beautiful holiday! Aloha!

Butter-fly away

Last weekend was a good weekend; it included the usual, friends, beach, and fun. This week has been a weird week. Tuesday in our morning meeting our manager Lisa told us to prepare ourselves because the week was supposed to be hot, with no wind, clouds or rain. The day ended up being super-hot with no wind or clouds. Around 10:30 I decided enough was enough and organized a rain dance. The organization of a rain dance is quite easy, It goes something like this “hey guys, let’s do a rain dance”. After dancing around and being blessed with two rain prayers from Bettina and Michael we went back to work. Ten minutes after our dance heavy clouds came with their friend the breeze and blessed us with hours of shade. Around 1:00 the rains set in. Not only did it rain, it poured, and it didn’t stop until Wednesday night. Everyone was so shocked that it was raining; the raider didn’t even pick up on the rain. It was seriously crazy, we were the only place out of the whole state of Hawaii (aka all the islands) where it was raining. Either we are seriously good at rain dancing, or I had a pretty good intuition rain was on the way. It was awesome, and since it was still pouring Wednesday, we didn’t have to work. Instead of work we got to do seed inventory and watch The Botany of Desire. It was nice I didn’t have to work because I woke up with a sore throat which turned into a full on cold (or something) so I ended up not working Thursday and today (the 22^nd). Getting sick seriously put a damper on my weekend though. Tonight is the full moon which means the full moon party and I am stuck inside my room. I am grateful for my health though, getting sick has helped me take some down time to nurture myself. It forced me to stop and rest, something I haven’t really done since I came to Maui. I have been reading, sleeping and actually laying out in the sun (most people wouldn’t assume this is normal “sick behavior” but it actually helps a lot). The past two days have also given me an opportunity to re align with my personal path. I have sat with myself in silence and heard the yearnings of my soul, which felt so nice. I find it so funny that it takes getting sick to really stop and take care of myself. It makes me think about all the people who don’t take enough time for themselves, and how much we could all benefit from doing so. Maybe getting sick is a way of forcing you to get rest when you don’t give it to yourself. I also have come to the conclusion that since my throat was the source of this “dis-ease” I have a block in my throat chakra. I realize I haven’t been fully speaking my truth, fully expressing myself and maybe being too accommodating to the point where it forces me to ignore the expression of my needs. This is something I know I have done all my life; I only recently realized this aspect about myself. I am now looking at how I can connect to my needs, fulfill them, but also be there for other people without compromising myself. I won’t lie and say it is easy; as a matter of fact it scares me. The funny part is I am not sure why I am scared of expressing my needs, and using my voice. When I finally seize the opportunity to do so I realize it isn’t scary at all. Maybe I have a deep seated belief that says “if you don’t accommodate others they will not like you”, which would make a lot of sense for me. I am grateful I am in a safe environment that encourages the expression of ones needs. Being here has opened my eyes to this habit and has helped me start to work through it. So I am actually pretty tired its only 10pm but sleep comes easy when your letting go of a cold! I hope all is well for everyone! Maybe you could even ask yourself if you give yourself enough time to rest, and what areas could you nurture yourself more? Are there times when you are too accommodating and push your needs aside? Growth is beautiful! Lori Grace, the owner of the farm says “we aren’t just growing plants, we are growing people”. Let’s celebrate our growth together, cheers!

Fun in the sun at 21!!

It’s a Bob Marley kind of morning (also known as a super great morning to listen to his beautiful music). The sun is shining, I have a nice warm cup of coffee and the sun is shining in my windows, “Is this love that I’m feelin?” I think it is! I am so happy, I am bubbling over with jubilation! There is no specific reason for this joy, except for the fact that I am alive, like really alive!!! Before I came to Maui I was in an extreme funk, living in a place I didn’t enjoy, working in a dark spa, really going nowhere, and doing nothing I enjoyed. It’s super sad to think about being so young and being between a rock and a hard place scared to go forward not know what to do. Leaving Orange County was the best thing I have ever done for myself. I was so caught up in the confusion of what to do I never took action towards living my life. Now that I have, everything is flowing, new doors are opening, and I am growing and changing so much and it’s the best feeling in the world. Even some of the harder things I have gone through are enjoyable. I would rather be growing than stay stagnant. Plus whenever I get down I think to myself “will this really matter in five years” and when the answer is “no” it blows over faster than I can say supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. So anyways my birthday was on Wednesday (13), I am officially 21 and 100% legal (I think I need a shirt that says that). I had an amazing birthday, the people I work with and my friends made it super great. Before I go into what happened on my b-day I’ll go back to last weekend when Bettina and I went snorkeling!

I still have to cover a few things from last month like the full moon party, this awesome meditation dance class and lots of beach time. To be honest I can’t remember all of it right now or I would write about it. All you need to know is I have been having so much fun, meeting so many amazing people, and loosing quite some sleep ;). There is another full moon party soon and it is on a Friday so I won’t have to work the day after with zero hours of sleep (which I did and totally rocked the farm doing it), I’ll be sure to write about that one though! Ok so last week Bettina and I decided to go to Lahaina to go snorkeling, which I was so down for because I have never been. Bettina Isis and I left around 2:00 to go to Lahaina, meet Ben there and walk around the town. Honestly Lahaina looks like Huntington Beach; it’s touristy and reminded me
of home. It’s a nice place if you want to be a tourist and forgo the real Hawaii experience, which some people like, but they are so missing out! The first thing I saw was the banyan tree which is In the middle of town, it is so amazing! At first glance it looks like a normal park with some scattered trees, but when you look closer you notice all the branches are connected making it one tree. It is so mind blowing to see one huge branch stretch from one tree to another. I have no clue how it works, its beautiful magic. We kept saying it was a Pandora tree, which I find myself saying about a lot of things on Maui. I honestly can’t describe how cool it is, you have to see it for yourself! After seeing the tree we walked around the shops and got a bite to eat at the cutest little oceanfront café. By the time we were done with lunch/dinner the sun was setting and Bettina and I decided to go find a camping spot. Honestly we got THE COOLEST, most beautiful camping spot ever! The free camping spots are literally sandwiched in between the ocean and highway. It literally takes ten seconds to walk to the ocean and ten to the highway. It is a little sucky because until about 11:00pm you hear cars passing nonstop, but after that you are left with the sound of waves crashing on the shore. By the time we got to the spot the sun was just about to go under the horizon, the moon was already up and the sky was painted with oranges pinks and purples. Naturally we jumped in the crystal clear water to have a nice sunset moon bath. The water was warm shallow and dead still. We were the only ones in the water, and we couldn’t see anyone around. It felt like God had giving us a sacred pool to rest in and witness the most beautiful scenery. Bettina started singing a beautiful ritual song and out of nowhere this huge beautiful white bird flew over us and then disappeared. The whole experience was blissful, I just kept picturing girls hundreds of years ago enjoying the same thing looking at the same moon and feeling the same magic we were. I could really feel how everything is connected, no time, no place, no me, no you just one. That sounds so cheesy but it’s the only way I can describe what was going on in my mind, or rather my heart. After our swim we climbed up this beautiful tree and just meditated there for a good 20 min. The evening was pure bliss. After out meditation Steve and Christian came to keep us company. Bettina and I flaked on being prepared for proper camping and forgot fire wood. The first thing Christian did was pull out his machete and started cutting off huge branches for a fire. I started joking about how convenient it would be if he had a saw too, and the next thing I see is him whip out a saw and saw down the branches for perfect fire wood (this guys is so crazy, he does the most unexpected things). We had no matches so Christian lit the fire with a rock and metal by making sparks. He is seriously a jungle man; I swear he could survive on his own in the wild no problem. It was so nice sitting around the fire singing and listening to music and eating yummy chocolate trail mix, I love camping. When we finally went to bed we decided not to set up with tent and just sleep on our blankets under the stars. It was a beautiful idea until around 3am the ocean decided to creep up on us and wash us out. The water made it all the way up to my knees, which was seriously the best way to be awoken from a deep sleep (NOT). After we moved back and dried off a little I slept like a baby till morning. When we woke up the boys wanted to go home and Bettina and I were still set on snorkeling, so they left and we headed off to get food and eventually snorkel. Snorkeling didn’t go as planned because it started to rain on us. It wasn’t even nice Hawaii rain, it was cold spitting rain. Lahaina is the dry side of the island, so it was Ironic that it started to rain on us (and not ironic “haha”, ironic “this sucks”). I took it as a sign that we weren’t supposed to snorkel there, maybe there was a shark and I would have one less arm right now, who knows. After waiting to see if the rain would stop, we ended up going all the way back to where we had camped and snorkeled there. It was still a nice spot, it didn’t have the most beautiful things to see, but for a beginner it was nice. The reef where we were was dead so it was all brown, but I saw some beautiful fish. I also scrapped my leg on some nice sharp coral. Apparently doing this is really bad because staff infection is extremely easy to get on the island and staff lives on coral, so you see why having coral cut you isn’t too great. My leg is totally fine but please snorkel with caution! After we snorkeled we went home and got ready for Isis’s going away party. The party was really nice; there was good food and good company! I already miss Isis, but she will be home in a month, so it’s all good.

For the sake of avoiding rambling over unimportant subjects, ill skip ahead to my birthday! The morning was beautiful and the sun was shining. When I got to the kitchen there were flowers and a candle on the kitchen table that Bettina had collected for me. It was so beautiful and sweet. At lunch my managers brought me vegan chocolate mousse cake and everyone come to the kitchen to sing and enjoy some food. It was really nice to have everyone around and acknowledge my birthday, it was special! Wednesdays are the grocery shopping day so we went into to town after work. Since it was my birthday we stayed in town and got some coffee and just hung around for a while. Later that night we went out for some drinks and I ended up not even being carded (buzz kill) but it was still fun. After we were finished we went back to the farm and had some fun island style in Bettina’s room till we were all practically asleep. It may not sound too exciting but I thoroughly enjoyed myself!Cheers to a new year, I cant imagine starting it in a more beautiful, magical place! Love to all <3

birthday flowers <3 onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx1k6XL1U_JjIR8cgEdteZ_aw1eHkKPympwaf5fZfykFIbCYU5n7U-NpW2G3n566rnQ4yy-2lCnEIEHJJcWIPwmkvoFQQCgxPZn9F0C_pIcz7N3pKeZKUsrHTfxCwMCQFO6SuzDgU9zQch/s1600/P1000198.JPG">

Lahaina camp site random pic of my manager Lisa

Beautiful Bettina Birthday Beer....and Steve

these two pictures are the same sunset, everyone was pulling over (including us) to watch the beauty unfold <3>

This is the Banyan tree! I did not take these pictures, but I figured there should be a visual for when my description failed <3>

Love is surrender

Cheers! It’s been a while since I have written, and the only thing I can blame this on is sheer laziness. I would love to be more tasks oriented (that’s a lie) but whenever I have some down time I would way rather sit in my room doing absolutely nothing, or go to the beach! Its not like I am super busy (well I kind of am) but communal life can be seriously draining, so when I get to be alone I take it and run with it. I have been here for over a month and I love it. Time is flying by and I have no clue how to slow it down, so I am soaking up every moment and fully enjoying myself. I am going to be completely honest with you about my experience here, because it’s not all rose beds and butterflies. I didn’t expect it to be perfect either, I knew I would grow and things would change, I would change. Change and detachment are a few of the biggest things I have been faced with. Isis said it perfectly the other day “here you will learn about plants and how to detach from life.” She was really talking about the impermanence of things, people, and situations and learning how to let them go when they are ready to be let go of. I have had to let go of parts of myself and my personality that no longer serve me. I am also learning how to get in touch with my emotions and really see myself in a new light. Every experience I have had has taught me something about myself, and brought out parts of myself I have suppressed. Beyond all the drama of our everyday lives is a secret lesson we are supposed to learn to further the evolution of this life. If we can push through the “problem” and get to the heart of the situation so much growth can follow. In the end living in a community such as the one I am living in is seriously beautiful. We are all here to support and love one another. This is such a beautiful thing to watch and feel. Watching others open up and grow has helped me blossom too. Last Thursday was Isis’s last day on the farm. Now it’s just me Bettina, Gil, Michael and the new guy Peter. I have seriously become attached to Isis and she brings such an amazing dynamic to the group. I especially love that there were three girls, having three works really well. Letting go of people is just a fact when you come to this farm, so you both have to embrace it and let go or resist and suffer (which really goes for all things in life). When I came to Maui my intention was to embrace change, and that’s exactly what the island gave me an opportunity to do. I’m not complaining, but it’s definitely been a nice little challenge. As all things in life the universe, god, whatever, gives you opportunities to grow. Sometimes these growth opportunities aren’t as grand as others but in the end all growth is a positive move forward on our journey! Now I have three weeks of stuff I have done to write about, I will try my best to get that done sooner than later, but seeing as my 21st birthday is tomorrow….I might be a little occupied ;) . Peace and Aloha!